How to Keep the Fights Clean & the Sex Dirty

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Ep. 5.1: Bye-Bye Friction Factors, Hello Peace Practices

It’s what you do well before any fights flare up that will dictate how OFTEN you fight, how BAD it gets and how LONG it lasts. INVEST even a little intention, attention and action BEFORE any problems surface and avoid it being DEMANDED of you later. Getting ahead of the game can create not only peace, but also a pathway to passion too!

Don’t wait for the tension to mount. Front-load for a fabulous relationship NOW! Join Gaby & Raj along with special guests, Tim Neal & Vanessa (Ness) Patrick, as we dive deep into “How to Keep the Fights Clean – BEFORE, “Bye-Bye Friction Factors, Hello Peace Practices.”

Special Guests Bio: Tim & Ness, founders of The Relationship Revolution help men and women understand each other better so that they can create extraordinary relationships and live more meaningful, happy and fulfilling lives together. Together almost 24/7 they dedicate their lives to learning, growing and leading in the area of relationships. They’re on a mission to transform the world, one couple at a time, to become more conscious, courageous, kind and contributing to those around them.

Vanessa believes that an extraordinary intimate relationship is what makes the difference between living to your fullest potential, and not. What lights her up most is helping couples reignite the spark and love for one another, creating an unbreakable team where they are each other’s biggest source of inspiration and encouragement to live to their fullest potentials. She’s grateful daily that she gets to evolve and improve, live the kind of lifestyle she has always dreamed of, all while traveling the world and serving her mission with her extraordinary partner, Tim.

After over a decade in the fitness industry and facing the major challenges of relationship break-ups, unfulfilling career paths and personal tragedy, Tim discovered what life was REALLY about… relationships. He now gets to travel the world with his Queen Vanessa, serving and inspiring others to create extraordinary relationships too. He credits meeting his incredible partner, Vanessa, as the best thing that has ever happened to him. Tim also loves travel, fitness, a good movie, green smoothies, pizza, red wine and a croissant (or 2 or 3).

To learn even more about Tim & Ness please visit their website:

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Lighten up and Laugh a lot End fights before they begin. Save being "nasty" for your sex life.

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12 replies
  1. Gaby Sundra
    Gaby Sundra says:

    The “butterflies” in your stomach aren’t what we think they are, they are not a signal that you are in love, they are a signal of ANXIETY. When I first met Raj, I didn’t have those butterflies, and I realized it was because I felt comfortable and like I could be myself!

  2. Gaby Sundra
    Gaby Sundra says:

    Your ACTION OPTION should you choose to accept it, is to…

    STEP 1: Ask yourself what a current or repetitive “problem” or Friction Factor is in your relationship.
    STEP 2: Name it so you can see it is a pattern at work
    STEP 3: Translate the Friction Factor into a path of action (Peace Practice). What lessons are being offered for YOUR growth and development?
    STEP 4: Set yourself up for success with reminders in your phone, bathroom mirror, support buddies, public posts, etc.
    STEP 4: Do what you said you would, PLAY the Game, practice the Peace Practices. Explore what works and does not
    BONUS: Do a “Post-Game-Analysis” to claim your wins, acknowledge your loses and declare next steps.

  3. Gaby Sundra
    Gaby Sundra says:

    Trying to avoid fighting about the “little things” is like holding a beach-ball under water. They will always push to come to the surface. Every challenge is an opportunity for us to grow and to create something even more extraordinary.

  4. Gaby Sundra
    Gaby Sundra says:

    Fighting can actually be healthy for you, unless one person apologizes and the other person doesn’t accept it. Any other form of fighting is not a bad thing, fights are only natural!

  5. Gaby Sundra
    Gaby Sundra says:

    The 5 Elements of an Extraordinary Relationship:

    1. Mastering Personal Power – how are you showing up as an integral part of your relationship, do you understand who you are and what you want? Cultivate that love within yourself. What are you doing to look after your own backyard to do more for the relationship?
    2. Creating Unbreakable Alignment – have something that pulls your through the challenges, create an exciting & compelling vision that you can check back in with to make sure you are on the right path
    3. Evolving the Flow of Love & Connection – a relationship is a place you go to both give AND get love. Be sure to love who they are down to the Soul level
    4. Ignite the Passion & The Attraction – play on the masculine & feminine dynamics, play up the lightness & the darkness, the animal. Watch out for stories that you create in your mind that can detract from attraction.
    5. Enhancing Win-Win Communication – pay attention to not just the words you say, but also your body language and your tone of voice in how you’re saying things because the large majority of communication is not just in the words.

    We have created a measuring tool around these 5 elements to help you know where you currently score to build that self-awareness. We check in on these 5 elements multiple times throughout our relationship to make sure we are on the same page, generally we aren’t! But that is a good thing, that means there is room to grow. This way we can constantly up-level our scores.

  6. Gaby Sundra
    Gaby Sundra says:

    Get our FREE Relationship Reset Kit:

    Get our 65+ page eBook that covers the 6 Solutions that REALLY Satisfy

    ALSO Be sure to join us next week for: Sex DIrty – BEFORE with special guests Marci & Dallas!


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