How to Keep the Fights Clean & the Sex Dirty

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Booty Before Breki

Stale, Predictable & Boring One of the most common complaints we hear when someone is unsatisfied with their sexlife with their beloved is that it can, little by little, get stale, predictable, and some even say, boring. Which sucks because that leads to you having less and less sexy-time and becoming more and more separate and ultimately even roommate like. […]

The Noose of Negativity & The Drama-Free Diet

The Noose of Negativity Negativity is the 2nd WORST thing that you can do to harm your relationship (More on #1 here). Indulge in negativity and you are putting a noose around your relationship’s neck! It’s not the big things that bring a relationship down, rather, it’s the day-to-day dynamic between you and your beloved that will determine the success of […]

Building Trust For Better Sex

Early & Often Sex gets sexy (or goes south) WELL BEFORE the seduction ever begins. If you invest a little intention, attention and action early and often, the baby step actions can lead to a tidal wave of positive impact on the intimacy and sexiness in your relationship. Keeping your relationship passionate should not be “work.” Let’s PLAY passion instead. […]

The Shared Relationship Vision Exercise

The Squeaky Wheel The squeaky wheel gets the grease, right? That’s why we tend to NOT give our relationship much attention until it DEMANDS it from us. How squeaky does YOUR relationship wheel have to get before you to DO SOMETHING? Designed for Delight? Now what would it be like to put an END to WAITING for problems to surface, THEN dissecting the […]

The Pleasure and Power of “Post-Play”

Ride That Wave ALL The Way In I grew up spending my summers on the beach nearly all day, every day. I used to boogie board – A LOT. One of my favorite parts of boogie boarding was riding the wave all the way to the shore. I wanted to savor the ride, and I would pump the […]

An End to Often, Extreme & Long Lasting Fights

NOW What?! The storm has passed. The fight is over. You survived. NOW what?! You may want to forget about the fight that just happened and “move on”, however, as they say, those who do not learn from history are DOOMED TO REPEAT THEMSELVES. So HOW do you lean into the lessons? After an argument, don’t just get PAST it, get the MOST out […]

How To Lead AND Listen, Be Forceful AND Loving

Context is KING! Before you dive into delicious sex, decide what you REALLY want and what is the CONTEXT for your most INTIMATE INTERACTIONS. Is your unsatisfying sex life just one more thing on the long list of things you can be irked with your beloved about? Or is your sexlife an inspiring arena to play, learn and grow together? Do […]

How To Pull Your Argument Escape Hatch

Logic Will Get You NOWHERE When you’re in an argument with your beloved and in the heat of it, LOGIC, REASON & PROBLEM SOLVING won’t do you very much good AT ALL. They can even be like gasoline to a fire – EXPLOSIVE! In a split second, it can be off-to-the-races and pretty quickly DEVOLVE into ugly rants that go […]

Set & Setting Are EVERYTHING

Set & Setting Are EVERYTHING! I’m not into psychedelics, but I sure am into super satisfying sex! Still, you can learn a lot about how to have super-satisfying-sex by taking a lesson out of the psychedelic handbook. “Set and setting” is EVERYTHING. Dr. Norman E. Zinberg developed this theory as applied to psychedelic experiences, but it’s a great eye opener when applied to […]

How to Avoid Argument On-Ramps

I Was JUST About To Do It! Do you CRINGE when your beloved asks you to do something that you were JUST about to do? For some reason it can be INFURIATING! So what do you do? You could SNAP at them and say “I was JUST about to do it! Get off my back! You’re so controlling!” You COULD. Although it WON’T […]